Tuesday, June 28, 2005

Jessica Alba: Did She Dodge That Bullet??

The Latest from the TomKat Rumor Mill

[FROM BeansTalk: This entire message was sent to BeansTalk. Meaning, WE DIDN'T WRITE IT, THIS IS NOT OUR BREAKING STORY or SOURCE. It's just really interesting. FYI, the Independent Sources link was removed within hours - the original source better be sure to check their credit and phone bills. You know they're on THE LIST. BTW, Someone else at Warner Brothers corroborated this rumor to BeansTalk.]

This is where the email begins:

"A friend of mine just got back from LA and heard this scoop about Tom & Katie from someone who works at Universal. The source said that they (Tom & Katie) have a five-year contract and he's paying her $8 million. The engagement happened so fast because Rob Thomas' (Matchbox 20) wife caught Rob and and Tom in bed together and they rushed the engagement so that it would overshadow that scandal. Obviously, take it with a grain of salt.

Read below. This was just published.

Independent Sources

Independent Sources Confirms Existence of Tom Cruise/Rob Thomas Rumor

Independent Sources announced today that it has uncovered a new, previously undiscovered Tom Cruise rumor: Tom Cruise and Matchbox Twenty's Rob Thomas are lovers!

Independent Sources has hesitated writing about Tom Cruise/Katie Holmes for many reasons. First, there are other things going on in the world that, believe it or not, rank higher on the importance scale. Second, pretty much everything that can be said is being said.

However, someone (I'll call her Mistress of the Hollywood Rumor) Just walked into Insider's office with the following dish that I feel compelled to pass on. I did a quick check of Technorati and it wasn't there. So even if it is not true, it is at least original.

No doubt that anyone with an Internet connection has read about Tom Cruise being gay. According to rumor lore, he has had a long-time boyfriend in Chicago who is an Asian pilot for American Airlines. This is an accusation that Cruise and more importantly Cruise's many attorneys vehemently deny.

There have been many stories that supposedly corroborate his sexuality but never a smoking gun. Rumor mongers attribute this to the fact that Cruise goes to great lengths to cover his tracks. We are told that everyone around him signs extensive confidentiality contracts with enormous penalties for indiscretion. (Exhibit A: the 8-page confidentiality contract Cruise's housekeeper was forced to sign).

Such stories have been around for years and Cruise has evidently attempted to counter them with a series of high-profile heteronormative relationships. First, Nicole Kidman, then Penelope Cruz, and most recently Katie Holmes. In each instance, the "relationship" is actually a contract that gives the women a boost to their careers, a lot of money, and an elegant lifestyle.

Here is where this particular rumor gets interesting. Not long ago, Marisol, the wife of Matchbox Twenty's Rob Thomas (who has had to contend with his own rumors of bi-sexuality) found her husband in bed with Tom Cruise causing Cruise's people to shift into high gear.

First, Mrs. Rob Thomas was bought off for an undetermined sum. Second, Cruise and his handlers set out to immediately find Cruise a girlfriend. Second-tier actresses were targeted. A list was drawn up with Jessica Alba (#1 pick) and three other girls who fell out for various reasons. Originally targeted (#3 I think) but later rejected as "undesirable" was rumor queen Lindsay Lohan. Way down at #5 on the list was Katie Holmes, but that was the one with whom they were able to strike a deal.

Once the contact was signed, photo ops were set up, leaks were made to the right places, and we've had celebrity relationship on steroids ever since.

One thing I will credit this rumor for is how it nicely explains Tom's behavior this past few months-including the couch jumping episode on Oprah. Cruise simply didn't have time for the Holmes rumors to circulate at its normal speed and he couldn't allow it to be second page news while the tabloids focused on Brad, Jennifer and Angelina. No, this relationship had to immediately become the "it" topic.

Well, that's how we hear it.

[A reminder to those of you reading this who have trouble differentiating truth from unsubstantiated rumor: at this point this is all conjecture. All we are doing is confirming the existence of a rumor that the Mistress tells us is all over Hollywood.] We should also add that this story is a bit of a departure for us. If you are interested in keeping up to date on it and other celebrity gossip, we suggest Defamer.

Ben Carter
National Sales Manager
Clear Channel Chicago
312 540 2124
281 749 8250 fax
281 687 7841 cell

End of e-mail. Judge for yourself. Something tells BeansTalk that it wasn't the smartest move to leave uber-flack Pat Kingsley. Posted by Hello